Funny and Witty Words of Wisdom for Newlyweds

Funny and Witty Words of Wisdom for Newlyweds

Weddings are supposed to be fun and romantic. When giving some wise marriage advice, you don’t need to always sound serious. Adding humor to the message can make the event more fun and unforgettable.

So we have a list of funny words of wisdom for newlyweds that you can use to start your speech or add to your message.

Funny wedding advice for the bride

Usually, messages for the groom are funny ones. But it doesn’t mean you can’t give a hilarious message to the bride. If you are the maid of honor or one of the bridesmaids, you can choose from any of these messages and modify them based on the situation. You can keep your marriage advice for the bride light and fun with these words:

-“Make him something to eat. That will keep him quiet for a while.” (Unknown)

They say that men turn into monsters when they’re hungry, so tell the bride to never let her groom be hungry.

-“Before you marry him, listen to him chew. If you can stand that noise for the rest of your life, then go ahead with the wedding.” (Unknown)

Funny and Witty Words of Wisdom for Newlyweds - A little girl sitting on a table - Stock photography

This funny advice actually makes a lot of sense. Sometimes, couples fight because of petty reasons. Tell the bride that she needs to accept her and her groom’s differences to make their marriage work.

-“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” (Erma Bombeck)

Getting married doesn’t guarantee anything. So let the bride know that she and her spouse need to work together to make their marriage successful.

Funny marriage advice for the groom

A lasting marriage is built on love and trust, but you can tell the groom some other funny wedding quotes and wishes that he and his bride can laugh, and maybe even think, about. If you need a funny best man speech or just want to make the event’s mood lighter, try these words:

-“Maths after marriage is simple. If you have $20 and your wife has $5, she has $25.” (Unknown)

This is one fun way to talk about how married couples usually handle budgets. Money issues are common reasons for couples to fight so they have to also prepare for this.

-“Advice for a husband: never laugh at wife’s choices, because you are one of them!” (Unknown)

Funny and Witty Words of Wisdom for Newlyweds - A group of people posing for the camera - Stock photography

Remind the groom that he is his wife’s choice, so he has to also respect her other choices in life.

-“Two things are necessary to keep the wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it.” (Unknown)

Remind the husband that having a happy wife means having a happy life.

Funny words of wisdom for the newlyweds

You can always do something different if you are tasked to give a message to the newlyweds during the wedding. You can share your wisdom in marriage in a funny way. Give them advice on dealing with their spouse, handling conflict, and even enjoying intimate moments, in a unique way. Check out this hilarious wedding advice and messages:

-“Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.” (Will Ferrell)

“Marriage is a bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.” (Unknown)

“May all your ups and downs come only in the bedroom.” (Unknown)

“Never yell at each other, unless the house is on fire. Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight.” (Unknown)

“The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” (Henny Youngman)

A successful marriage is based on the couple’s trust, loyalty, and love for each other. But you can let them know that a marriage will be even more successful if they can laugh and be happy together. You can tell them that they can start having fun while listening to your funny but useful advice.

Whether they’re parents’ advice to newlyweds or just simple quotes for newlyweds, you can add some humor and make the wise words and wedding wishes less boring. Funny words of wisdom for the newlyweds can make the event more colorful and interesting.

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