As you grow old, you will experience different kinds of failures in life. It can be a failure to meet the expectation from others, disappointments and the most common is rejection. Being able to formulate a way to handling rejections in love will help you as an individual in bringing normality back into the tract of your life.
Handling rejections in love
One of the needs of an individual according to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs is Love and Belonging Needs. On this part, an individual must feel that they are loved and they belong to a social group. If an individual cannot achieve this stage, they cannot proceed to the next ladder which is the Esteem Needs, which are the prestige and feeling of accomplishment kind of need. If an individual was rejected, they failed to meet this important need.
Success and fear are connected with rejection. When looked closely, being able to succeed portrays that you are being accepted. And if you fail, there is the interpretation of being rejected. And one of the most painful rejection is the rejection of love.
The suffering of this kind of rejection is unbearable for most individuals. Stress and depression can be associated with this kind of failure. One interesting fact about some individuals, they tend to be attracted to another individual who is not as passionate about them. The fear of rejection and being rejected made an individual more passionate to get what they cannot have, making rejection harder to bear.
When you realized that you are about to be rejected or are being rejected, there is the feeling of not being able to eat, sleep or feel that you should talk less, you cannot work well or concentrate. These symptoms can last for several days or even weeks. Self-esteem will be lowered and the rate of your anxiety will increase. In some cases, the negative feelings will eventually fade with some help in your inner circle, but you will continue to see brighter and duller days.
Handling rejections in love: coping up with pain
It is true that time heals all wounds, here are some of the ways to cope up with rejection that will ease up the wounds shorter than promised by time.
1. The pain will eventually go away
Convince yourself that you can get through this pain because there is no other individual who can help you effectively other than your self. Being able to accept the fate that has been given to you will lead to acceptance. Understanding that some of us are not meant to be will always lead to self actualizations and will guide you through the healing process. Mourning is just a part of the rejection. Mourn if you want to. But always tell yourself that life must go on and you will meet someone new that will value you as much as you value yourself.
2. Go out and get physical
Have long walked, jog around parks, play tennis, go to a yoga class or even enroll in a gym class, these are just some activities that will help you relax and distracted with the recent rejection. This will also force you to concentrate on what you are doing and live with it. This will also start a feeling inside of you that you are alive. Getting and engaging in an exercise activity can be addictive but beneficial to you.
3. Focus on the External
It will be hard for now, but eventually, it’ll get better. Avoid putting blame on yourself. You are just a person and proven to be not perfect. Find a companion within your shell. And that is you. If you start to redraw your past decisions and mistakes, gently draw yourself away from the thought of it and distract yourself from your external environment.
4. Explore things that are new to you
When you have recently gone through a tough rejection from someone you love, it is hard to explore and discover new things. But being able to force yourself into something new will help you focus and concentrate. In addition, it can be a way to meet new people that you can bond with or be friends with.
5. Travel places you’ve never seen before
Go to the beach, explore the message from the waves and it may calm your body and soul. Keeping yourself away from places that bring back the memories of your rejection could speed up the healing process. Explore new cultures and stay active on your vacation.
6. Meet new people
Don’t be scared to meet other people. Open yourself up with others, they may help you put into a new shape and bring back the old version of yourself before the rejection. It may be hard to let people in because of your recent rejection. But not all people will tend to reject your feelings. There will be someone who will care to listen to your stories. But in this process, just focus on meeting new people and shoo away the thought of being intimate with each other. After all, two rejections can be too painful to process.
7. Consider attending some therapy session
Therapy can be one on one or group therapy. It is up to you if you will engage in that particular therapy. Don’t be shy to ask for help. You have been rejected and you don’t know what to do and where to run. What you are feeling is too painful and seeking professional help is an option. With years of study, therapists have a profound way of dealing with this kind of problem.
Handling rejections in love: never give up
There are a lot of reasons to fall in love with a person. And when they chose to not choose you, there is also a lot of reasons to fall. When the world gives you a thousand reasons to fall, be your own friend and give yourself seven thousand reasons to fight and get up. Don’t let a person dictate your value. You are the captain of your mind and soul and you, only you can set your value. Remember that everybody deserves to be loved.