Obvious Signs you are not Enjoying Friendship Anymore
What is your view of friendship? Like anyone, friends are also allowed to make mistakes. Like when your dear friend forgets your special day. Or had flaked on you on the past days, she lied the previous month. Or somehow get disappointed with little things recently. But, if you start feeling that your friend is no longer considered as one of the best things that happen to you, you might be under a toxic friendship.
If the signs become so subtle, this type of friendship has the probability to sneak up on others. Generally, a friendship is toxic, this may harm you in the emotional aspect instead of helping you, according to a clinical psychologist. You would know the signs you are not enjoying friendship, or you can indicate if you are no longer enjoying the friendship when they brought sadness, anxiety, and stress. These signs are never helpful to be who you wanted to be. In the worst case, it may lead you to create some self-doubt and drain you as a whole.
Don’t stress yourself, check these signs if you are having an unhealthy friendship:
1. You give more but get less or nothing.
Genuine friendship gives and takes if you have a friend who seemed in a need of your constant help, yet does not return the favor even in a simple way, chances are you have a toxic friend. Experts believed that there should be a balance between what you are giving and what you are getting. An example is a person who always takes over the conversation, yet show no or little interest the time you will share your side. This friend may have lots of excuses or go somewhere.
It’s not good advice to simply dump someone who is not present in the times of need, especially if they are in hard moments too. Friendship is meant to be flexible or able to comprehend what is going on. But if the pattern is constant, you are always in the giving side for a long time, no reciprocity at all, it is a clear sign that it’s not sustainable anymore.
2. Seems the trust is no longer there.
Trust is a basic foundation of friendship, there is no point if you cannot count on to your friends. One of the best signs that something is not well if you cannot trust that they have good intentions towards you. It can be a promise of picking you up at the airport, then back out at the last minute. But, if the reason for breaking a promise is legit, it’s quite fair then. However, if you feel such constant treatment of letting you feel down, that is a different story already. The high-level of affection might be hard to provide and to continue the said friendship.
3. You freak out upon checking your phone
Keeping up with friends has been made more convenient through the use of technology. And, you will know that you are not a priority when that being will only communicate if they needed you and instead of happiness, you’ll have a dread in the pit feeling in your stomach. Real friends should never let you worry or freak out as the phone rang or buzzes. Maybe the right time to click the no disturb button.
4. You no longer like to spend time with them.
If you feel like dancing whenever a plan of meeting your friend is canceled, it can be because you’re tired of exerting the effort for its worth. Instead of excitement, you feel obligated or drained instead. The increase of anxiety, stomach disturbance, and headache may happen if you’re hanging around with this friend.
5. It seemed you are not the best version of yourself when you’re with them.
Toxic people can spread the same character to others. As a quote stated; bad people bring out the bad things in you. If you are around these types of people, you cannot express your best behaviors. It can be will drink a lot, being passive-aggressive, do some gossiping and other kinds of stuff.
Or it can you are wrapped with fear when you’re with them, resulting from it not to show your true colors. You are like in an eggshell where you find it hard to interact or react right there and then. And most of the time you feel so lousy about yourself. Such obvious signs you are not enjoying friendship.
6. You know they’re talking bad at your back.
Although there can be a spectrum of people talk about some negative things behind you, if your relationship as friends started to resemble episodes, it can be toxic. You have to find out if these friends are doing it out of concern or best interest, or not at all.
7. You begin to be your friend’s competitor.
If you guys are trying to be healthy, there is nothing wrong with that. But, if it comes to the point of having unhealthy competition, this is another thing already. Yet, at the end of the day, see to it that you have no bad feelings towards your friend and just wanted the best for her/him. What is no longer normal is to become jealous over and over or from time to time. This may end up to a constant fight or argument that each of you wants to win over and over, that’s a sure toxic thing.
8. You are not sure if their intentions are real.
No relationship is perfect, but if it’s true, the intention is always good. Your friend’s intention always matters. Although there might be moments you get hurt unintentionally, it won’t be hard to forgive. Because you know very well that only toxic friends could hurt you in cold blood.
There can be more signs you are not enjoying friendship, but if you are quite sure it’s no longer healthy, better stop before things get worse.
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